I turned 30 recently, and let me tell you, it threw me for a crazy emotional roller-coaster loop. I generally love birthdays way more than the average person (maybe because I'm a leo and/or because receiving gifts and words of affirmation are my main love languages...?). This year, however, instead of my usual uncontrollable excitement, I felt a super weird mix of dread, disbelief, and overall emo-ness.
Me the first 29 birthdays of my life:
Me this year:
I tried to process WHY I had that onslaught of negative feelings and pretty much a full-on 1/3 life crisis over this birthday. I think it was a mix of mourning the end of my 20s (which I really freaking loved) and the disbelief that I was actually this old - 30 always seemed like this far-off distant age that would never actually get here. I never really pictured myself not in my 20s, and I definitely wasn't ready for them to end yet.
If you're nearing the big 3-0 yourself and starting to freak out a bit, I suggest two things to help ease the weirdness of entering this new decade:
1.) Have a support system in the form of one of your oldest/bestest friends and/or family come celebrate with you (even if you don't feel like celebrating).
Kayla is one of my all-time best friends who lives in Denver. She started asking me months ago, "When you are celebrating your birthday? I'm coming to celebrate with you!" and even before the full-on 30 dread hit me, I wasn't feeling very celebratory and told her she didn't need to come. ("My birthday's on a Tuesday this year...I probably won't do anything big...Don't worry about it..")
THANK GOODNESS SHE DIDN'T LISTEN TO THAT CRAZY TALK.
I was SO happy/thankful she came to Dallas the weekend after my birthday. Having her visit to look forward to significantly helped me get through the super-emo-full-on-30-dread weeks leading up to my birthday. It also helped that she gave me one of the most thoughtful/wonderful birthday gifts I've ever received- 30 different gifts that each had individual notes with memories and/or "things she loves about me." It felt like Christmas!
My parents also came up from Houston for the birthday party weekend, and I'm so glad they did! I also gave them the whole "you don't need to come... I don't really even want to have a party... blah blah blah" crazy talk. Having them there to celebrate this momentous birthday and meet my friends was so fun and special. :)
2.) Take comfort in the wise words from some amazing, successful, badass women who have already paved the way into 30 and are making it look gooooood.
In the weeks leading up to my birthday, I reached out to several girlfriends who had already entered this foreign new decade to discuss their experience, and I came to this conclusion from this unscientific survey:
You'll more than likely either freak out at turning 29 (ahhhh it's the last year of my 20s!), 30 (yowzaaaaaa how am I already 30!?!?!), or 31 (holy crap I'm IN my 30s!). It was comforting to know I definitely wasn't the only one who freaked out at 30... especially because all the friends I talked to said how quickly those negative feelings dissipated after they turned 30 and how much they're LOVING their 30s now.
Here are some inspirational quotes on the topic from these wise friends, a few famous people, and a random dude I'm friends with on Facebook...
"30s are really better than 20s... less bullshit, same fun." - Jane
"In a sense, it is closing a chapter, but there are so many things left to accomplish and experience in life that are only going to come with age. 30 is not death, if anything it is the beginning of a life that is more aware and self-assured." - Lorrin
"Don't worry - it's actually no different. And you don't have to check the other age box until 35 anyway, so you're still young!" - Eva
"30s are way better than 20s! You get to actually live rather than just planning for it." - Cristina
"Every year of your life is better than the last, right? So 30 is going to be your best year yet." - Mary
"Your twenties come with a lot of self-doubt and anxiety around big life questions: What are you going to do with your career? Who are you going to end up with? Where are you going to live? In your thirties, you just know yourself better." - Lauren Bush Lauren (Philanthropist)
"Age 30, for me, means balance." -Sarah Lane (Soloist with American Ballet Theatre)
"My twenties were great, but they were hard. You want to get past the learning curve and then have fun. I feel like I'm already having more fun in life in this decade than in the past one." - America Ferrera (Actress)
"At 30 you finally start to catch up on those dreams you've been chasing for the last 10 past years." - random dude I'm friends with on Facebook
I've been 30 for 1.5 months now, and I can assure you - it's definitely not the end of the world. Life is still very happy and very good. :)
(Throwing a fun birthday party helps too).
xoxo,
Annie
